" I cant live without you " - A christmas blog

'' I try to live without the pain,

and get myself out of the rain,

but i can't live without you".

"I like to live without the constant fear,

and endless doubt,

but i can't without you"

Knowing me, well yeah if you know me well enough, i like to relate myself to music. If you hear me hearing hardcore bang up music, means i feel like im in the gutter. Or might as well so deep in the dumpster. Well since last night i cant get these words out of my mind, " I try to live without the pain and get myself out of the rain, but i cant live without you ". Its taken from the first version of My Immortal from the Origin album, Evanescene first album.

I'm like being paranoid for no reason, well after had a few talks with my bf, after telling him to leave me, yeah i felt like patheticly lost. But hey he promised not to leave me, we'll see how it goes. And if anybody ever read this , yeah so sorry this is the only place i could go mushy mushy emo emo, and pour my heart out if i cant talk to my bf. I really thank god that i found him, really overbless with gratitude. Who else could be patient with me other than my bf ? Since i met him, its been "tear for a tear, baby eye for an eye".

"What would i do without the nights that he kept me warm?

When this cold world had a girl caught in a storm."

When i cry who wiped my tears? When im scared who told me there's nothin to fear ? When i need a shoulder to lean on?

He'll always be there. I appreciate him for that, and i hope this relationship last for a very long time, i love ya Bakry.

Silly yours,

Eryn

p/s: so what if you wanna puke after reading this, i love him ! Thanks to this blog page, at least my creativity its not wasted elsewhere...peace n out !

:*:Where love is more than just your name:*:

Love - makes you go crazy at one time, and brings you back to earth the next minute. My first encounter with love was few years back, with one guy whom i used him to get free chocolates, hah dont blame me i was just 9 that time. Ok, there were this one dude his name is Fuzzy [not real name], hah he says im cute when we went for this camping trip in some woods in Selangor. When the campfire night, he acted as my superhero in some play we had. When school starts again, he keeps talking to me and try to get lunch place next to me - yeah in private school we got lunch time in a cafeteria.

Well that was few years back, wonder what happen to Fuzzy. Well Fuzzy thanks for the chocolate. Right now im in love with my Comel, yeah Bakry. He's like the second nicest guy i met after Sherry, whom died in an accident at Genting Highlands Highway. He cares a lot about me and really concern about everything. But recently i told him to find someone else, cause of some personal matters. After i did that, i felt like a big lost, like someone just died in my heart. Cried like mad.

Note to self : Never tell anyone you love to leave you, cause you might never know what's gonna happen in the future.

Thanks to Bakry, i learn few things about myself. I'm such a sensitive person, and yeah he really opens me up, i could see the real me, cause all these while im blinded by stuff.

I love Bakry,
Eryn

p/s: nevermind if you find this boring - cause its just a page to express myself, dont mind if ya wanna take a laugh at it or go sleepy !

If you love someone so much, and the feelings are strong, its hard to get mad over them right?

Arguements ? Fights ? It is normal for a couple to fight or argue, dont tell me you never do that with your love ones before. Well knowing me, whenever i get mad , i'll start shouting or banging some stuff just to release my tension. The longest fight i ever had was 1 and a half year with some people i dont wanna say the name here.

Yesterday i had one with my bf, well it was over some small stuff. Think of it again, it is kinda stupid, well nobody's perfect.Guess what, i was only mad for 3 hours, yeah..knowing Eryn thats a record, lol. Starts feeling guilty and called my bf, and said im so sorry for getting mad. Well i do love him a lot to get pissed at over small matter.

My blog is getting boring day after day, drop me a line, cause i lost my touch at writing after X-fresh thinks im not a rookie any more !!!

I love Bakry,
Eryn.

What a day.

Freaking tired, well had a freaking day.
For a start i slept like 5am yesterday and woke up at 9am, uhh yeah 4 hours of sleep.
Attended a wedding, well yeah it was fun, had to help them and all.
Now im freaking tired, but i cant sleep. I gotta make up my mind, what to do after this, follow my mum to see my cousin who's sick or go out with my bf. Well i wanna do both, but if im following my mum sure im stuck there like hours and all, but i have kept my bf waiting today, so i wanna make it all up to him.
Well yeah, choices in life. What to do, we're all human, accept what happen and take life just for what it is.
Sometimes we will start thinking of immortality, split yourself into half and do both chores as what my pet brother Nadjmi, always tell me "Immortality take it, its yours!" or you could just go immortal sobbing yourself with your piano to Amy lee's song, oh yeah its my favourite.
Life, i think its true, my life just ended just like that for nothing for the past one month.
Gotta go make coffee now, refresh my head with a cuppa of caffein as long you dont get stoned up !

Mucho love ya,
Eryn

If Tomorrow Never Comes [i dunno its written by who, but i think its so sweet]

-If Tomorrow Never Comes-

If i knew it would be the last time
that i see you walk out the door
i would give you a hug and a kiss
and call you back for one more.

If i knew it would be the last time
i'd here your voice lifted up in praise
i would video tape each action and word
so i could play them back day after day.

If i knew it would be the last time
i could spare an extra minute or two
to stop and say i love you
instead of assuming you would know i do.

If i knew it would be the last time
i would be there to share your day
well im sure you'll have so many more
so i can let just this one slip away.

For surely there's always tomorrow
to make up for an oversight
and we always get a second chance
to make everything right.

There will always be another day
to say our i love you's
and certainly there's another chance
to say our "anything i can do's ?"

But just in case i might be wrong
and today is all i get
i'd like to say how much i love you
and i hope we never forget.

Tomorrow is not promise to anyone
young or old alike
and today may be the last chance you get
to hold your loved one tight.

So if you're waiting for tomorrow
why not do it today ?
for if tomorrow never comes
you'll surely regret the day.

That you didnt take that extra time
for a smile, a hug or a kiss
and you were too busy to grant someone
what turned out to be their one last wish.

So hold your loved ones close today
whisper in their ear
tell them how much you love them
and that you'll always hold them dear.

Take time to say "i'm sorry, please forgive me"
"thank you" or "it's okay"
and if tomorrow never comes
you'll have no regrets about today.

My December

Well hey its me Eryn.
Just completed my SPM last December 2nd. What im gonna do after this, well yeah loads of people been asking me this. Seriously i have no idea. It's like my life just ended as soon as i finished my exam, heh call me a "skoolaholic", cause i seriously miss my school. I know its sound stupid right, how could you miss your pathetic school who tortured you with burdens of homeworks and assignment for the past 5 year..[i meant Form 1 to Form 5]...

Yeah, lucky me i dont get chosen for NS..compared to some people,lol..so what have i done since i finished my exam..well :

I have been talking to my bf. He's my comel, sweetest guy around..hanging out with him makes you feel like a princess. Well, he's Bakry. I met his mum one day ago, she's cool, she thinks im ok..well good grief...this is the second time i met anybody's mum when i coupled..

I have been bullied by some big bully in Australia, well yeah Zul..my cookie monster and im his elmo..gonna meet him in six months time, thats if im here in Malaysia.

Meeting up cliques catching up lost time. But we're not having a good relationship these days.

Well if you looked into my mind this whole December its full of Bakry, my bf.. although we dont meet up occasionally, we'll talk always..he's nice, i am seriously in love with him, nice dude, how do you explain ? Well get in my shoes and you'll understand what i mean.. I Love My Comel !

And this is my first blog, why i did i decided to post it ? Firstly im freaking bored, secondly its just to show some PEOPLE im good at it too, shh not gonna mention her name here.

I know this might be boring, but ill update it ok ? Dont blame me, this is my first blog anyway..so drop a line for a chat..[its_me_eryn@hotmail.com]

Silly Yours,
Eryn