Lately I've decided to write more on my personal views of what I see or hear in my daily life, rather than telling the whole world about my dramatic day. This is the small steps I'm taking to be a writer. So discuss and yell at me if you have to.
It seems there's a lot of talk with teens and individuality these days. With the ads and everyone saying to be yourself, you think everyone is completely distinct and different. After all you should always be unique and not be influenced by other people right?
What a load of bullshit.
First of all let me explain influence. Many people think you shouldn't let other people influence you because it will change who you are. Manipulating someone will take away their freedom and their own choices right? Well if you really believe that, answer this.
How did you pick what kind of clothes you like to wear?
Go to your drawer and pull out your favorite clothes. Look at them and ask yourself why do you like them.
Is it the color?
The designs?
Those cute frills or cool patterns?
Now ask yourself this question. Did someone influence you to like them? You're probably thinking "What are you talking about? No one told me to like these, I told myself that."
Well think of it this way, you like those clothes because you were influenced to. Look around you. Are people wearing clothes similar to you?
Chances are they're wearing jeans and so are you. You don't actually like them because of your own choice, you were influenced to have a liking toward your clothes.
It may be hard to grasp the idea so I'll try to give an example. I am an average teenager. Like all teenagers, I want a lot of stuff. Recently a lot of my friends bought the new iPod. Seeing that almost everyone has an iPod, I now wants one too. It doesn't matter if the iPod is useful or not, or the fact that everyone thinks its cool. Whatever the reason, it doesn't change the fact that I was influenced. I was manipulated into wanting the iPod.
Manipulated sounds like a harsh word, huh? Well technically I was manipulated, although you can use the word "influence" for a less brusque tone.
Even if people stopped trying to change you, its impossible to not be influenced in other ways. Anything can be an influence to anyone. Every action in this world results in some kind of change, even if its the slightest. Action turns into reaction, causes create effects.
Examples of influences and their results:
The child talks like a wannabe because the older kids talk like that.
The girl wears revealing clothes because she likes the fact guys check her out more.
(I know I always do that..)Now there's nothing wrong with being influenced. After all everyone is being told to do things, or their surroundings are telling them. You can't escape it either. All around you things are telling you something.
The shopping mall is telling you to shop there. The health commercials are telling you to be more conscious of your health. Your group of peers are telling you to be more like them.
The world is constantly telling you something. Each living thing or object is talking to you. Everything in the universe wants to tell you things: they want to have a conversation with you.
These conversations can happen any where and at any time. In fact they do happen everywhere, every time. They may be saying things that you don't believe but the more they talk, the more you listen. And the more you listen, the more those crazy things sound perfectly right.
That my friend is what influence is.
The world tells you something and you either choose to listen or not. Once you listen to enough of the conversation, you slowly start to accept is as your values or beliefs. You absorb these conversations into your head, which turns into values because you refer back to it. What makes you you is your collection of these values and beliefs.
In this world, you are nothing: there is no such thing as being yourself.
Your personality and values: these things that make you you were already created a long time ago. You are just combining these materials, fabricating them into an unique creation. Wearing jeans isn't something new, and neither is being nice.
Your values were thought of already, you don't have anything original to offer. The only original thing you have is the unique combination of someone else's beliefs. You are a collection of influences and values, and you are constantly changing. That is what you are.
So now you understand why I don't like it when people say
"Stop trying to change me!" or something like that. Remember you're just a vessel for storing different beliefs. Those beliefs will always change. It's not your will or choice. You are going to be different , you are going to adapt to your surroundings, you are going to change.
You are going to listen to those conversations, and you will believe them.
